Do you bookmark or to dog-ear your page? How about eating and drinking whilst reading? Here are 5 things that drive many book-lovers I know to distraction…
1. You’ve moved house. The walls are wonky and the furniture just doesn’t quite sit against them properly. You’re looking around you for something to pop under the legs of your chest of drawers to even it up slightly… something slim and stable that’ll slot in just so. Ah… how about that stack of paperbacks over there? One of those under each leg will do it! (Guys- even typing this makes me feel queasy! Chocking up furniture with books is a crime. End of.)
2. There’s nothing better than reading in the bath. Relaxing back for a long soak in the bubbles with your favourite romantic heroes. But doing it with borrowed books is such a huge no-no! One little slip of the hand, or droop of the eyelids and SPLOOSH! You are on your way to making papier mache…
3. Hot cups of tea / coffee / hot chocolate popped down on top of a book. People – seriously! Book does not equals coaster. And no, just because it’s a glass of prosecco doesn’t magically make it acceptable.
4. You know the age-old controversy- to bookmark or to dog-ear your page? I’ve got something even worse to throw into the mix, something that will make any true book-lover shudder. Leaving a book open and face down. Stop it. Stop it right now!
5. Number 5 is a really personal one… but something that brings me out in a cold sweat of fear no matter how beautiful the end result. Book art. Yup – I’m talking about art that is made by cutting up or bending the pages of books to create something else- where the book can never be a book again. I don’t care which book they are made out of- it’s barbaric and sends me into a state of existential breakdown, sobbing and mourning for the book’s loss of life.
So there you have it. How to be horrible to books. Don’t. Just don’t! (Now I’m off to give my favourites a quick cuddle.)